Argentum-Sneak Peek

Original concept cover

So this is something I've been writing for a while. A long while, actually....it's dystopian fantasy and I love it a lot. I've never put it on the blog because I'm waiting to finish the series entirely before I find a publisher for it. This will be the IT book - the one I'll really really seek to get published because I love it so much.
Only there are like a million different threads all tangling around in this book, so I may actually be set back by a few years before I'm fully satisfied with it.
This is a tiny eeny weeny bit of the story I simply wrote so as to understand my characters much better. Some of you wanted a more romantic scene from the earlier writing samples....so here it is....
The pic is just a random creation (I have a hundred for this book)






The girl I've used as stock is by catarinamzfernandez on DA. Thank you! 
The Excerpt:



AYU
I come to in the White Room, chained with words spinning around my arms and legs.
'I didn't choose to be in that memory' I say, murmuring, my face growing hot and flustered with what I had seen. I'm helplessly putting myself in Kenna's shoes-in her bare feet, more like- thinking I would happily be her just for his love. He doesn't look very loving right now, he looks angry.
'That is a very personal memory. I didn't want you invading those. Does Zan need my memories now,too? I'd have thought my life was enough....' Rian says, his eyes dark, bruised circles beneath them like he's suddenly ill and heartsick. Is it even possible for him to be sick in this place?
 He's pale and his lips are pressed in a thin line, like he's afraid he'd scream.
I sit on the white floor and watch, disturbed, as dark red flows slowly down the walls again. His heart's bleeding, I think obscurely, while he presses the side of his face against a wall.
'I didn't mean to be in there. I didn't mean to. I'm helpless; it's you who controls what I see' I'm wringing my hands together, my eyes riveted half on the walls, half on him.
He smiles sardonically. 'So I'm supposed to pick, huh? Pick the reels of my life you are to watch. I'll arrange them in priority, shall I? Or do you want to see the painful ones first? That might be interesting to you, hmm?'
His smile is mocking, his whole posture tense and rigid, his words spoken harshly. 
A shiver runs through me while I try to form words.
I can feel a lump beginning to form in my throat. I hope the lump doesn't get too many ideas and decide to run upto my eyes and dissolve in a puddle of water.
 I open my mouth to deny, to protest, but the strings of words wrap around my mouth as well, and the ones around my shoulders pull me up and off my feet. He looks at me calmly as I sway in the air, terrified, my heart beating hard against my chest, my eyes starting to water at the humiliation. He looks at me dully.
'You won't understand.', he says, coldly, his eyes completely drained off any feeling ',You won't know what love feels like. You're Updated, you've lost all that'
Or have I? It's the wrong question, I think, even as he puts me down with a derisive snort, rests his chin on his knees and looks like a lost little boy again. The question is not if I've lost every human feeling. The question is more layered, more nuanced.
The question is whether I've lost enough that I can't feel for him. What do I feel for him? Do I feel anything for him? I can't say, and I don't think I really know, myself.
'I'm leaving'
He looks up, sullenly. 'For now or forever?'
I meet his brown gaze evenly.
 I say nothing at all.
 Let him wonder.
A curious sense of triumph courses through me when he repeats the question.
'Are you going to come back, or have you had enough?'
'Either way, you won't have cared unless you're curious'
He shrugs. 'It gets boring in here.'
I smile to myself, and then I say my code, and the MedicEye brings me back to the real world. 

So what do you guys think?!